Cover Letter
Your Honor Sir or Madam,
I’d like to express my deep appreciation to you for spending time on reading my writing portfolio. My writing portfolio consists of a reading log on “The Necklace” by Guy de Maupassant, three essay drafts on “Dead Men’s Path” by Chinua Achebe, and a final timed-writing. Including this cover letter, this portfolio shows my progress in the academic writing class in the spring of 2007.
I have been worried about English writing since I joined the class and studied with many brilliant students. It is the first time that I have learn to write in a logical way and try to accept a new writing conception.
With the help of my teacher, Mr. Corio, I have known a lot about how to prepare a precise essay. A reading log is the first step, and then the plot summary and thesis statement make contributions to the further understanding of the story. With the comments and suggestions from peers, revising the essay draft gradually is really meaningful to perfect the essay. I believe when you are reading my papers in this order, the improvement of my writing ability can be acknowledged.
My first paper in my portfolio is a reading log on “The Necklace” by Guy de Maupassant. As it is my first reading log, I choose it because it shows my original style and idea about writing. At that time, I knew little about how to write, so I just retold the story in another way. But some of my thoughts on the story have been shown as well. I believe it is a good beginning in my writing course.
The second paper is my timed-writing. I have three timed-writing activities during this course and this is the final one. It was finished in forty-five minutes. As I didn’t have enough time to proofread it, it contained some grammar mistakes. But I can build a clear structure and give voice to my main idea centered on the topic. I believe the timed-writing training enables me to write a completed paper in the period of limited time.
My three essay drafts are concerned with the character and failure of Michael Obi, the hero in the Dead Men’s Path. In the first draft, I presented some of my ideas with personal emotions and person pronouns. And I used many wrong conjunctions, which makes some paragraphs seem to be illogical. My partners gave me lots of comments which helped me understand that if I try to prove my thesis, I had better divide it into several parts with proper conjunctions. But owing to many practices in the class, I have a clear thesis statement, a brief plot summary and a vivid structure, which shows my improving command of organizing an essay.
So I revised my first draft and explained my thesis from two aspects in the second draft. In order to support the thesis, many evidences from the story are also revealed by incorporating quotes into the sentences. However, I failed to tell the story exactly to the readers, especially those who have never read the story. So my teacher, Mr. Corio, pointed out to me this weakness and advised me to tell the story in brief when necessary. By revising the second draft, I have learned to use moderate details from the story.
When working on, I took some comments from my partners and added the background materials of the author in the instruction instead of Igbo history. Meanwhile, I included the source of the information I used. The title is also changed to make the essay more attractive, too. I believe my writing ability is on the upgrade, as is my understanding of the formal pattern of English writing.
I have worked hard for this course for the whole semester and I truly hope to make my endeavor seen and recognized. Besides, I hope to thank my teachers and classmates again for their kind help and timely encouragements. And to my respectful readers, I also want to thank you for reading my papers and it is hoped that you will understand my progress and ideas on writing.
Your sincerely,
Ruby
Essay Draft Three
Ruby Zeng
Jun 20, 2007
Draft Three
Selfishness Leads to Failure
Crowned as "father of modern African literature"(Associated Press), distinguished Igbo writer, Chinua Achebe, is well-known for his novels, which mainly describes the effects of Western customs and values on traditional African society. As his father is a teacher in a missionary school, Achebe was installed in both traditional Igbo culture and Christian education. Achebe witnessed the various changes in Nigeria during British colonization as he grew up, especially conflicts between the old Igbo and the new Western ideas.
So in Dead Men's Path, Achebe tells a story of a newly appointed headmaster, Michael Obi, who tries to create a better situation for students and promote modern education. However, all of his achievements are ruined after he closes the local religious object, the Dead Men's path.
What causes Michael Obi's failure? Can such a failure be avoided? Together with this question, descriptions on talks and approach of Michael Obi in the story will be discussed. And it is easy to find that Michael Obi's selfishness is the instrument to his inevitable failure.
In accordance to the literal meaning, selfishness is an act that concerns chiefly or only about oneself. Once it becomes immoderate, the sense of selfishness has bad effects on one's behaviors and decision-making. One’s selfishness can be revealed in his acts and words. And Michael Obi's selfishness shows in his self-centered approach and sense of superiority.
In the beginning, Michael Obi "expected" (52) himself to be a reformer in education before he is appointed as headmaster of Ndume Central School. He is always "outspoken in his condemnation of views of these old and often less-educated ones" (52), and now he has to do something constructive to prove that his ideas are worthwhile. That's why once he seizes the opportunity, he begins to carry out his "wonderful ideas" (52) as soon as possible. In a word, he has to choose self-centered approach in order to ensure that no one will disturb his work.
The point can be seen in his opinions of the school when he shares with his wife Nancy, who has been influenced by his passion for many years, the good news of his being appointed. Even Nancy is "downcast" (53) when she knows that she will not have the chance to show herself off among other wives because of the fact that all the colleagues "are young and unmarried" . However, Michael Obi holds absolutely opposite viewpoints about that. He not only sets a strict demand on himself, but also tries to be the master of his staffs and make them devote themselves to the school.
Self-centered approach also results in his stubborn attitude towards the "dead men's path". The path, which leads to the burial place, is built to honor the dead men. And local people believe that it can help their ancestors find the way back home. In fact, the path is not only a passage but also a special religious symbol. As the path traverses the school premises, Michael Obi is furious about it and he plants the "heavy sticks" (54) to close the path, as a result of which local people can not walk through the campus freely. However, when talking to the priest of Ani, Michael Obi promises that he can "even get our boys helping in building" (54) a new path. Is it a kind of concession? No, Michael Obi somehow compromises only because he knows that a balanced and harmonious relationship between school and the local tribe lays a solid foundation to promote his modern education. By doing so, he can ease up the tension. His solution to the conflicts shows that he does not care about where the path is at all, unless the path blemishes his school.
If Michael Obi really wants to eradicate the old and uneducated custom, why does not he insist on destroying the path? Apparently, the only thing he focuses on is how to make his school better. He just wants to enlighten students in order to show his achievements. For the sake of building his authority and strong stance both at school and in the village, he chooses to close the path but fails to leave enough space for maneuver.
Besides his self-centered approach, Michael Obi's ignorance to local religion has its origin in a sense of superiority. Michael Obi is the model of young man educated by Christianity system. When coming into power, his sense of superiority glues ups his clear eyes. So he considers nothing more than his education and school, neglecting the needs and traditions of local people. He refuses to accept any suggestions, which will stop him from promoting his educational conceptions. In a sense, he regards himself as the god in the village and defiance he can not suffer.
The priest once said that:"Let the hawk perch and let the eagle perch."(25) It gives voice to a very simple principle, that is, we would rather understand and respect than sharpen the cultural differences. Michael Obi speeds up his conflicts with local people and he pays for it.
On the day when the Government Education Officer comes and evaluates the school, the angry villagers destroy the beautiful garden, one school building and open the path again. The officer writes such a poor report on Michael Obi and his schools that his career is over.
Maybe the end of the story sounds cruel for Michael Obi. But suppose the local people had not ruined the school, would Michael Obi have failed? Actually, He will not run school well for long as well. Despite having the common base of western education, Michael Obi will still meet problems with his colleagues, wife and even the Government Education Officer. His inner desire may be obstacles in his way of running the school. He takes things into account only according to the benefits of his achievement. Be that so, what a poor school in his charge!
As a whole, Michael Obi is a gifted man but his selfishness has swallowed him. In some sense, selfishness can be compared to some kind of chronic poisons. It will not get you into corner as soon as you drink it, but it corrupts your body day by day. Selfishness helps Michael Obi set up big desire and work for it, but it ruins his achievements finally.
Work Cited
Chinua Achebe. “Dead Men’s Path” 1953. Rpt. in The International Story: An Anthology with Guidelines for Reading and Writing about the Fiction. Ruth Spack. New York: St Martin’s, 1994.6-8Associated Press, “Chinua Achebe Wins $120K Man Booker Fiction Prize”. Wednesday, June 13, 2007; Page C04
Essay Draft Two
Ruby Zeng Michael Obi’s selfishness and his failure In Dead Men’s Path , Chinua Achebe tells a story of a newly appointed headmaster, Michael Obi, who tries to create a better situation for students and promote modern education. However, all of his achievements are ruined after his destruction to local religious object, the Dead Men’s path. Governed by the British, the vast majority of Ibos converted to Christianity during colonialism; however, especially when the author was growing up, many Igbo villagers still respected their local god. So as in the story, the old traditions come into conflicts with new Western ideas. By analyzing descriptions on talks and approach of Michael Obi, it is easy to find that Michael Obi’s selfishness is the instrument to his inevitable failure. In accordance to the literal meaning, selfishness is an act that concerns chiefly or only about oneself. The selfish sense has bad effects on one’s behaviors and decision-making. Michael Obi’s selfishness shows in his self-centered approach and sense of superiority. From the beginning, Michael Obi has “expected” (1) to be a reformer in education before he is appointed as the headmaster of Ndume Central School. He is always “outspoken in his condemnation of views of these old and often less-educated ones” (1), now he has to do something constructive to prove that his ideas are worthwhile. That’s why once he seizes the opportunity, he begins to carry out his “wonderful ideas” (1) as soon as possible. In a word, he has to choose self-centered approach in order to ensure that no one will disturb his work. This point can be seen obviously in his conversation with his wife. As is “completely infected by his passion” (3), his wife, Nancy conceives of her proud position and the settings of the school. Nancy is “downcast”(9) when she knows that she will not have chance to show herself in other wives because all the colleagues “are young and unmarried” ; however, Michael Obi shows absolutely opposite viewpoint about that. He not only sets a strict demand on herself, but also tries to be master of his staffs, making them “give all their time and energy to the school.” (8) Self-centered approach also results in his stubborn attitude towards the “dead men’s path”. Michael Obi knows that a balanced and harmonious relationship between school and the local tube lays a solid foundation for promoting his modern education so he also makes some concessions. When talking to the priest of Ani, he promises that he can “even get our boys help in building” (P26) a new path. His solutions to the conflicts set out that he doesn’t care about where the path is at all, unless the path blemishes his school. If Michael Obi really wants to eradicate the old and uneducated custom, why doesn’t he insist on destroying the path? Apparently, the only thing he focuses on is how to make his school better. He just wants to enlighten students in order to show his achievements. For the sake of building his authority and strong stance both in school and the village, he chooses to close the path while leaving enough space for maneuver. Except his self-centered approach, Michael Obi’s ignorance to local religion has its origin in a sense of superiority. From one of his teachers, he finds out that the path leads to the burial place of the village and he is furious about that. Michael Obi is the model of young man who educated by Christianity system. When coming into power, his sense of superiority glues ups his clear eyes. So he considers nothing more than his education and school, neglecting the needs and traditions of local people. He refuses to accept any suggestions, which will stop him from promoting his educational conceptions. In a sense, he regards himself as the god in the village and he can not suffer defy. The priest once said that:” Let the hawk perch and let the eagle perch” (25). It gives voice to a very simple principle, that is, we have to understand and respect but not to sharpen the cultural differences. Michael Obi speeds up his conflicts with local people and that’s what causes his inevitable failure. To say at the least, suppose the local people haven’t destroyed the school , will Michael Obi fail? I don’t think he will run school well for long. In spite of having the common base of western education, Michael Obi will still meet problems with his colleagues, wife and even the Government Education Officer. In order to realize his desire, his fever may be obstacles in his way of running the school. He takes things into account only according to the benefits of his achievement. What a poor school!
May 21, 2007
Draft Two
Essay Draft One
Ruby Zeng
May 1, 2007
Draft One
Selfishness: chronic poison
In Dead Men’s Path , Chinua Achebe tells a story of a newly appointed headmaster, Michael Obi, who tries to create a better situation for students and promote modern education. However, all of his achievements are ruined after his destruction to local religious object, the Dead Men’s path. In my opinions, Michael Obi’s selfishness is the instrument to the inevitable failure.
When first reading the fiction, I was deeply shocked and pity for Michael Obi’s miserable ending. He looks like those devotees who seek for the common happiness to the next generation while putting aside personal emotions. So it is absolutely unfair for such a perfect person who receives well education and works hard. Moreover, my understandings of the character of Michael Obi have been changed after reading the fiction again and again. He turns out to be a selfish man.
In accordance to the literal meaning, selfishness is an act that concerns chiefly or only about oneself. The selfish sense has bad effects on one’s behaviors and decision-making. The two main weakness of Michael Obi, idealism and obstinacy are deeply rooted in his selfishness.
On one hand, we all know that Michael Obi holds an ideal conception to his work. Though the author doesn’t tell directly about Michael’s selfishness in the fiction, he mentions his wife’s reflection. As is “completely infected by his passion” (P3), his wife conceives of her proud position and the settings of the school. As well as his wife, Michael himself reaches after a beautiful and modern school to step up his fame.
Furthermore, before Michael Obi is appointed as the headmaster, he has “expected” (P1) it for a long time. Obviously, there lie deeply his ideal thoughts. That’s why once he seizes the opportunity, he begins to carry out his “wonderful ideas” (P1) as soon as possible. He is always “outspoken in his condemnation of views of these old and often less-educated ones” (P1), now he has to do something constructive to prove that his ideas are worthwhile.
On the other hand, selfishness also results in his stubborn attitude towards the “dead men’s path”. Michael Obi knows that a balanced and harmonious relationship between school and the local tube lays a solid foundation for promoting his modern education so he also makes some concessions. When talking to the priest of Ani, he promises that he can “even get our boys help in building” (P26) a new path. I don’t think the concession he makes shows his cowardice or waver, but his solutions to the dissension sets out that he doesn’t care about where the path is at all, unless the path blemishes his school.
If Michael Obi really wants to eradiate the old and uneducated custom, why doesn’t he insist on destroying the path? Apparently, the only thing he focuses on is how to make his school better. He just wants to enlighten students in order to show his achievements. For the sake of building his authority and strong stance both in school and the village, he chooses to close the path while leaving enough space for maneuver.
Then why does his failure become inevitable? In my opinion, besides the two main weaknesses, his ignorance to the local religion has its origin in his selfishness. It is selfishness itself that makes him think in a self-centered way towards other cultures. By this way, he considers nothing more than his education and school, neglecting the needs and tradition of local people. The priest once said that:” Let the hawk perch and let the eagle perch” (P25). It gives voice to a very simple principle, that is, we have to understand and respect but not to sharpen the cultural differences. Michael Obi speeds up his conflicts with local people and that’s what causes his inevitable failure.
To say at the least, suppose the local people haven’t destroyed the school, will Michael Obi fail? I don’t think he will run school well for long. In spite of having the common base of western education, Michael Obi will still meet problems with his colleagues, wife and even the Government Education Officer. In order to realize his desire, his fever may be obstacles in his way of running the school. For example, when talking about the staffs of the school, he is glad that “all our colleagues are young and unmarried”(P6) because “they will give all their time and energy to the school.”(P8) He takes things into account only according to the benefits of his achievement. What a poor school!
As a whole, I truly believe that Michael Obi is a gifted man but his selfishness has swallowed him. I’d like to compare selfishness to some kind chronic poisons. It will not get you into corner as soon as you drink it, but it corrupts your body day by day. Selfishness helps Michael Obi set up big desire and work for it, but it ruins his achievements finally.
Final timed-writing
06301030075
Ruby Zeng
June 21, 2007
Timed-writing three
Direction: In Dead Men’s Path the priest says” let the hawk perch and let the eagle perch.” Discuss what you think he means and what this saying reveals about him.
In Dead Men’s Path , when the priest comes to negotiate with Michael Obi about the path, he once says ” let the hawk perch and let the eagle perch.” The saying seems not easy to understand. But when connect it with the whole story, I find that the saying is meaningful and profound.
During their talk, the priest explains the origin of the path and tries to make Michael Obi understand that the path is essential to the local people. He does not want to come into conflict with Michael Obi but he is refused directly and rudely. So he leaves and says the saying as a conclusion. It means although he can not persuade Michael Obi, he hopes that Obi will understand the deep meaning of the saying and change his minds.
The saying shows that when different people from various backgrounds live together, it is important to respect everyone’s will, religion and culture. It just likes in the forest, different kind of birds live together and man has no rights to disturb their life. The priest compares Michael Obi and his school to the hawk, he and his tribe to the eagle. He believes that they are equal and they can share the same earth so it is reasonable that they should not disturb each other.
Then what does the saying reveal in the priest? The influence of the saying on the priest can be discussed in two aspects.
On one hand, the saying reveals in the priest’s attitude towards Michael Obi and his school. When talking to Michael Obi, he keeps calm and never says a bad word about school. Even when the Michael Obi says proudly that the aim of school is to eradiate the stupid ideas about the path, the priest still shows great respect and patience. He never criticizes about Michael Obi because he knows human’s character is diverse and it is no use to change other’s conceptions. His attitude indicates that he just wants to save the path in order to avoid the further conflicts.
On the other hand, when he fails to persuade Michael Obi, the priest leaves directly. He stops arguing with Michael Obi. In the saying, the hawk and the eagle are different. They perch in different places, eat different food and have different life style. But they never disturb each other. Now the priest believes that he can not make Michael Obi change his mind so just let it be. He hopes that the god will solve the problem just like the nature will decide the perching places for birds. His abnegation is not a kind of concession but it shows his truly faith of the natural principles and his religion.
As a whole, the saying stands for a gritty and profound spirits of villagers and their religion. I think it gives voice to a very simple principle, that is, we would rather understand and respect than sharpen the cultural differences. And it also calls for a sense of tolerance to make people live in harmony. The saying is both meaningful to the story, and the busy world today.
Reading Log
A Destiny's Joke
Reading The Necklace in English is a brand new feeling for me, one that is quite different from reading the Chinese version. But strangely, I can not help comparing the original with the translated one. It may sound ridiculous; however, I regard the whole novel as a joke by enigmatic destiny.
At the beginning of the novel, Mathilde, pretty and proud, is set in a family which can not satisfy her dream. To see an old friend seems difficult for her, because her friend owns everything she has admired. She can not put up with the gap between her friend and her, which reminds her of her plain family and weak husband. It suggests a foreshadowing for her later life, that is to say, her expectation of unique life is doomed to failure.
Then the invitation from the Minister for a great ball seems to be the reversal of her fortune. I feel amused that not only has Mathilde dreamed of such an opportunity to plunge into the official world and meet distinguished people, but also her husband, who knows her very well, encourages her to do so. Then from her friend she borrows the necklace, a so-called glorious diamond necklace. Just as we readers think, Mathilde is excited that she will realize her dream through the ball. Unfortunately, it is just another trap.
As we all know, after showing herself off for the whole night, she loses the necklace borrowed from her friend. She has no choice but to borrow money to buy a new necklace, and then in the next ten years she and her husband work hard to pay for it. Finally, she loses her beauty, happiness and dream; she totally changes into a common housewife, busy and tired. Destiny plays the role of a stander-by, watching her miserable life and laughing at her vain efforts. It reveals to her in the end that for ten years she has worked so hard for a faked diamond.
Then why does not she talk to her friend as soon as she finds the necklace lost? I think she has no other choice, for her being peacockish proud will not allow her to talk to her friend honestly. Living in a family which could not equate with her friends’, she has suffered a lot; then how can she suffer such embarrassment?
It is the ten-year hard life that turns her into a new Mathilde, a common woman who is satisfied with her plain life. As a result, she can now face her friend and tells the story. Many people hopes that she can get what she has lost from her friends, but I think the lost time and cracked dreams can not be mended. Her pride and dream has gone away with her tears and sweats. Destiny forces her to treasure all she has gained.
Learning to cherish and being honest values a lot, but Mathilde pays too much.